· Hollywood StrikeWatch: The lessons of 1988. The studios rattle their sabers with one hand, then produce a giant bouquet with the other. Is it just us, or do the writers totally get the bum end of the deal in this tug-of-pencil-war? Taking the appropriate, assistant-fucking measures.
· IggyGate: Ellen DeGeneres falls apart over a dog. The threatening publicist call. IggyMania grips a nation. A plea to stop the Iggy madness.
· Britney hits sock-bottom.
· The Passion of the Grazer.
· Barry Sonnenfeld steals the show at the HRTS luncheon.
· Defamer hits the High Times Stony Awards green carpet.
· Gettin’ Awkward with Martha: Joey Pants’s secret ingredient is pain. A Symphony in Crotch-Major.
· Step 13: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of the engorged contents of some guy’s pants in a stairwell.
· “We’d rather smother ourselves in a vat of hot kettle corn that see Jorja leave CSI!“
· Frankly, we have no idea what the Kid Nation revolutionaries find so terrifying about lovable Michael Jackson.
· Brokeback 2: The Mountaining.
· This is the dawning of the Age of the Wondershitter, but we doubt that news has yet reached The Phantom Pooper.
· FBI agents raid David Copperfield’s warehouse, discover a fighter jet and the Statue of Liberty.
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