Bad Dogs

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“Living Lohan” and “Denise Richards: I’m Constipated” premiered last night and two words perfectly sum up both shows: DOG SHIT! Seriously, why are dogs on reality shows always shitting on the carpet? Always! I notice these things.
The Osbournes’ dogs shit on the rugs. Anna Nicole’s Sugarpie shit on the rugs. Jessica Simpson’s Daisy shit on [...]

This Woman Is Married To The Berlin Wall

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54-year-old Eija-Riitta Berliner-Mauer of Sweden claims to have been married to the Berlin Wall for 29 years. Her surname translates into English as Berlin Wall. Clever. NOT.
Eija said she’s been diagnosed with a condition called Objectum-Sexuality. Basically, she likes to do sexay times with inanimate objects. She has never had sex with a human. [...]

Boat?

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Brandy’s little brother, Ray J, was kicked out of a Hyatt in DC on Saturday morning, because hotel security found weed and a club drug called “Boat” in his room. I had to google this boat shit, because I always like to try new and creative ways to speak to the heavens. Boat is apparently [...]

Kiki Is Depressed

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Kiki Dunst checked into rehab earlier this year and everybody thought it had something to do with her boozing ways. I mean, the girl likes to drink. Kiki told E!’s Marc Malkin that she went to rehab because she was really, really sad.
She said, “I went there for depression. It was a good six months [...]

Just Renting

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Over the weekend it was reported that Brangie had spent some of their hard-earned cash on a $60-$70 million mega estate in the South of France. They didn’t buy the joint. They are only renting it. Broke fucks! They probably got their furniture from Rent-A-Center. Brangie should put those kids to work for some extra [...]

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