Golden Celebrity

• Dane Cook as John Lennon. That’s apt. [BWE]
• It’s Juneteenth today. Time to celebrate the freed slaves! This year, the government’s finally coming through with those 40 acres and a mule. Just kidding. Fuck you, descendants! [SH]
• No more doofus hats on grup parents who hate growing old. [ICYDK]
• Maria Menounos is still [...]

One of the best things about cult living—and the military—is that you never have to stress about your haircut. No muss, no fuss, no flipping furiously through magazines trying to find “something cute but sassy.” Cult people just get their aesthetic orders from outer space and then give their entire family that ‘do. Simple.
More beyond [...]

If I Did It, the canceled book authored by OJ Simpson that details not how he committed the murders of Nicole Brown and Ronald Goldman but how he would have, has been leaked, and TMZ has the gripping passages:
Now I was standing in Nicole’s courtyard, in the dark, listening to the loud, rhythmic, accelerated beating [...]

One time my mom went out to lunch with an ex-girlfriend of mine who was trying to work her way back into my life. I didn’t find out about it until two weeks later, and when I did I felt like both of them had trespassed against me. It didn’t ruin the family or anything, [...]

It’s not that it’s not understandable to get a little testy when throngs of cameras are ubiquitous, and it’s not that one need always exercise extreme patience and grace in the face of annoyance, but nothing short of physical assault is going to get the paparazzi to stop taking your picture. Thus, giving them the [...]